Here you will find a useful list of terms to help you decipher the kitty code found throughout this page. Comment below with your suggestions for kitty terms!
cat [kæt] – a formidable beast which dwells inside the homes of poor suckers and feasts upon all manner of prey contained therein, enslaving its inhabitants through various means of manipulation and operant conditioning. Found inherently within some words (1), but can also be used as an affix (2) to enhance meaning.
(1) Communication is very important in human – feline interactions.
a. Catmas is the most wonderful time of the year.
b. The rebel forces attempted an unsuccessful coup d’écat.
claw [kla] – a sharp, retractable implement used by cats to climb trees/legs, destroy newly reupholstered furniture and slice open their unsuspecting prey. Can be used as a standalone (1), or as an affix (2) to enhance meaning.
(1) The corporation was threatened with a clawss-action lawsuit.
a. The school play was a complete clawtastrophe.
b. The town recently passed a new byclaw prohibiting dog ownership.
feline [filajn] – referring to the species in question. Can also be used to describe someone who is pro-cats (felinist). Also often seen in pun form.
(1) I’m feline fine today. [I’m feeling fine today]
fur [fər] – A thick, luscious and often soft coat which ends up covering all furniture, clothing and can even make its way into soups, salads and hot meals. It has been called the “glitter of lonely people”. Can be used as a standalone (1) or in a word to enhance meaning (2a), often in adjective form (2b).
(1) I slept fur 8 hours last night.
a. The player was called off the ice for interfurence.
b. I finished reading William Faulkner’s The Sound and the Furry.
hiss [hIs] – The warning sound made by cats when they have been subjected to force-cuddles to the point of losing their cool. Can be used as a standalone (1) or as an affix to enhance meaning (2)
(1) I really like hiss new collar.
(2) Now don’t go into hissterics!
kitty [kIti] –
litter [lItər] –
I have litterally 25 cats.
meow [miao] –
(1) Meow, class, we will watch a short video.
(2)That’s simply ameowzing!
paw [pɑ] –
The pawsecutor rests his case.
pounce [paowns] –
purr [pər] –
It was a simply purrfect evening.
pussy [pəsi] –
tail [tajl] –
whisker [wIskər] –
to be clawntinued…